Thursday, August 5, 2010

55 Words Magpie-I Dream of Being Seen As The Evergreen

I dream of being seen
As the ever-green
As I stand at the edge of your yard
With my best regard.
That way,
I'll stay
alive, with no rest
As the light of the sun dies in the west.
I'd never turn brown
even if you forget about watering me
while being out of town...

*****
This is an entry 4 Magpie Tale hosted by willow at:
http://magpietales.blogspot.com/2010/08/mag-26.html

And an entry for Flash Friday 55 hosted by G-man at:
http://g-man-mrknowitall.blogspot.com/

Happy Reading!
Happy Creative Writing!

64 comments:

Caty said...

very clever, Jingle...To live life as an evergreen :)

Thom said...

Very well done my friend. I could never write like that. Excellent. Have a great Friday :)

Muthering Heights said...

Ha! I wish my plants would stay green when I forget to water them...

moondustwriter said...

so clever Ji
hope all is well

love from the Moon

Kavita said...

That was a lovely read..
Just like a young seed
It made me feel light
Like a butterfly bright! :)

Thank you so much for this beautiful poem, Ji... A green and fresh Magpie!! :)

KB said...

Very cute. I wish my plants would stay alive when I forget to wtaer them.

magiceye said...

that was wonderful!

Catalyst said...

Nice rhyming, Jingle!

g-man said...

Jingle Belle....
You are such a positive, creative talent.
Thank you for always playing with so much passion.
You Rock Baby...
Have a Kick Ass Week-End...G

Marilyn said...

I like this, well done.

TALON said...

Jingle, I hope your evergreens remain forever lovely. One of mine is acting up - trying to turn brown, but I think I've convinced him it's not a good color :)

cosmoscami said...

Nice.
It has a lyrical sound to it.

Rinkly Rimes said...

A lovely poem and a gentle thought. 'Even if you forget to water me'....that's true love.

kathew said...

oh to be evergreen! alas-I need water! Nice Magpie!

nana_ang_poppaphil said...

Nice one Jingle. Me too I wish my plants would stay evergreen..

Claudia said...

...i wish i had more plants like this jingle...
think it's also an interesting way to look at life - could be interpreted as not being too dependent on the watering of others but stay green even if the conditions are not too good
clever one!

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Very good Jingle I do so admire people who can do 55 words and drabbles. can't seem to get the art of those.

Yvonne.

John's comments said...

High five for the plants! If you want to hear (yes hear!) or read my Friday 55 Flash fiction then click here. Hope you have a good weekend!

Tabor said...

Clever...wish my plants felt the same way!

Systematic Weasel said...

Cleverly written! Wonderful magpie, Jingle! Have a great Friday!

-Weasel

annell said...

At the edge of the yard, is very good!

Aoife.Troxel said...

Genius.
I liked:
As the light of the sun dies in the west.
I'd never turn brown

Prayer Girl said...

This is beautiful. Love the fact that you took care of two birds with one poem. :)

PG

Bandan said...

Thats an amazing way to depict feelings of a plant, loved the piece. Keep writing!

lime said...

ah, not unlike my widows. :)

what a great metaphor you have here!

flaubert said...

Very creative piece Jingle
Happy friday!
Pamela

Jannie Funster said...

Love, soft as an easy chair.
Love, fresh as the morning air.

ever.... ever..... greeeen

(You know that Barbara Streisand song?)

xoxo

BEAUTIFUL!!

if not for the trees
yous and mes
would not be
so let's cheer for the trees!!!!

xoxo

Eric Alder said...

Wouldst that we should all be forever green... but we cannot... for, as Robert Frost pointed out:


"Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay"


So must we go, too.

Jingle said...

Jannie:

You know that Barbara Streisand song?
I don't know, Dear Jannie!

This is written by me and 100% by me,
I did not look at anything when I write it...I simply want to look at things from the plants' perspective and include the watering can, in 55 words...

Thanks for the sweet comment.
Thanks, everyone for the encouragement.

Doctor FTSE said...

That's cool, combining two challenges/prompts in one poem. Counting words and keeping track of rhyme . . very well crafted.

sarah said...

this made me laugh cause I'm sure my plants cringe knowing I'm the one in charge of them.

AmyLK said...

Very clever! I am always forgetting to water the plants. Maybe I need an evergreen. lol

Mama Zen said...

Very clever!

JamieDedes said...

I really, really like this, Ji! Nicely done and wonderful sentiment. Thank you!

Out here in the blogospher - just visiting and catching up. Nice to have your cheery posts to read on a dreary Friday.

:-)

Helen said...

I enjoyed your Magpie ... my back yard is full of evergreens and my front is landscaped with high desert plantings .... love the carefree life of my yard.

Sam Liu said...

Clever, beautifully crafted and quite, quite, charming, Jingle. A wonderful Magpie and a marvellous 55 indeed :D

Unknown Mami said...

That was a lovely read.

Arian T said...

speechless.. this is truest magpie I've read this day :)

Angie Muresan said...

This is so pretty! And very clever too. I wish I could rhyme.

So nice to meet you. You have a lovely blog.

Ruth said...

I've always admired the majesty of a good evergreen! Very nice.
Thank you for your kind words.

william said...

brilliant, simply brilliant xxx

Carrie Burtt said...

I like your style! :-)

Stafford Ray said...

Oh for someone who sees us so! But who could forget to water you, standing at tne edge of her yard with your best regard? Don't stay, get out while you can.

Tumblewords: said...

Evergreen is a very fine thing!

Ana Goncalves said...

What a wonderful verse!

sheri said...

jingle, what an excellent magpie AND your 55, combined!! i loved your work and found myself giggling at the end, realizing it was going to thrive with or without the help :)
happy day, my friend!

Bernie said...

I'm sure if my plants and flowers could talk I would hear as I approached them: "oh oh here comes the hang woman" Love flowers so much but do not have a green thumb at all......:-) Hugs

JBSTUFF said...

Hey thanks for the follow. I am going to add a link on my list. You have a great site.

she said...

cute, clever, fun. Thanks!

izzy said...

Well- another week gone past- glad it is done!
Thanks for sharing as always...love the rhythm and structured rhyme.
'Being seen' and dreams do get mixed !
I need to play with the being seen-

Judy Sheldon-Walker said...

Lovely poem with wonderful imagery and thoughts.

Lyn said...

Imagine staying young and green forever..good for you!!

Cielo Azul Jewelry said...

Heehehee, so cute=0)

Happy Saturday,
xoxo,
Carol

Ed Pilolla said...

there's something fierce and fun about the spirit of this. it's pretty cool that you can find both in the same place.

Linda said...

Wow Jingle, that is cool and clever. You got too birds with one stone. Love this one!

Sue J said...

I enjoyed this one. Nice Magpie :)

Paul C said...

Enjoy the metaphor of striving to be green and vibrant.

Lena said...

Nice little piece. I certainly don't have 'evergreen' fingers!

Catherine said...

short and sweet!

Elizabeth said...

Aren't we lucky that a sturdy evergreen doesn't need our attention to flourish? Quite a nice poem, and really like the sentiment on the end.

Elizabeth

signed...bkm said...

Great Magpie Jingle... clever and well done...bkm

rel said...

jingle,
evergreen; cool poem.
rel

willow said...

Lovely! Green is good.

sweet pea. said...

hi there. thanks for stopping by, and for your comments.



i like your blog