Sunday, January 8, 2012

The Loss of Her Own Identity


A stream craves to see a faraway river,
That sounds quite a favor;
It does not fit normal view,
because not all folks’ dreams can come true;
“Come fly with me”,
An invincible voice echoes repeatedly,

The stream is determined to go,
She would not listen to objections so,
To be able to fulfill the task,
She has lots of questions to ask;
Eventually she has preparations done,
Merrily, she marches ahead, what fun.
The path is full of twists and turns,
Yet the thirst to get closer still burns,
Crossing villages, hills, and cities,
Revolting from regions, states, and counties,
After numerous zigs and zags,
The stream is excited to see her new tags:
She has joined the river forever,
Her own identity does not matter.
Nobody knows what future might bring,
She is satisfied to live with her choice-her king

38 comments:

magicinthebackyard said...

I feel that way sometimes. As if my own self is lost to the river. Felt. Nice write!

http://magicinthebackyard.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/letters-dear-death/

kez said...

thank you for sharing x

booguloo said...

Great Imagination.

zongrik said...

lots of amazing imagery here

bumble bee

Judy Roney said...

Wow, I love the thoughts of the stream going through all that to become part of the rier. Beautiful. I see lots of metaphor here.

Marbles in My Pocket said...

Wonderful write!

http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/billy-bully-bull/

Grace said...

Effective use of the metaphor.. from stream to joining the river. As long as one knows the consequences, and can live with giving up their own identity...then its all that matters~

BragonDorn said...

I agree! This is some great imagination works :)

LifeInVerse said...

In the end, I think the choice she made was the right one :)

meirozavian said...

Brought me into.
Nicely done.

Laurie Kolp said...

To me it's like a free spirit going out on her/his own... great metaphor!

mrwatson215 said...

Great write

ds said...

I'd say she didn't lose her identity so much as find it, by going against the "conventional" stream...

~L said...

This hit me deep within me! I felt this... and you had many powerful lines....

Thanks for sharing such a beautiful poem!

~L

Harshad mehta said...

Interesting metaphor. One must be willing to drop identity to merge.

And river merge with sea!

Ava said...

Enchanting... a metaphorical masterpiece. My offering: http://verseinanutshell.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/count-on/

nana_ang_poppaphil said...

Beautifully written, one of your best

The Unknowngnome said...

She grew and flew.

Good working of the metaphor.

I agree with LifeInVerse.

Enigmatic Soul said...

The poem has this feeling of emptiness and ultimately, being completed by the merging of the stream and the river in the end. Wonderful poem.

Brian Miller said...

She has joined the river forever,
Her own identity does not matter.
Nobody knows what future might bring,
She is satisfied to live with her choice-her king

nice close...and she is the one that will have to live with that decision...this felt like a nice blend of the last 2 mags...

Rajlakshmi said...

ohh I love the metaphors and beautiful imagery :D

beccagivens said...

Nicely done ... great imagery and metaphor use ... successful poem! :)

David Rheins said...

very nice, evocative poetry.

The Observer said...

wow

Quotes,Photos and a little Poetry said...

I just want to thank you, and tell you your awesome.

Isabel said...

great images

Andy Sewina said...

Yeah, you really got in the flow!

Tifiny said...

perfect as a fiction,

in reality, it is not going to work that magic though.

Thanks for sharing the beauty of creativity.

Dan Roberson said...

Becoming one with the river of life and rushing onward is a journey worth taking.

Elaine Danforth said...

Whoa! I'm not quite sure how to take the end. I love the image of embarking on a seemingly impossible task, and making the perhaps lengthy and difficult preparations, and then finally going for it, and ending up content in a changed (perhaps even somewhat diminished or lost identity). Nice work.

And thank you for your visit and comments on my blog.

Kay said...

It's good to follow one's own convictions. I like this!

manicddaily said...

Very original both in idea and execution. K.

PremI said...

A great travel with lots of twists and turns... and a beautiful message.

Amber said...

Beautiful in every sense of the word! :)

~L said...

mmmm... your words invited many emotions to my soul. This was absolutely beautiful!

~L

Mrsupole said...

Very nice. It shows that we make our own paths in life and that we are interconnected and if one finds a river worth flowing into then how great is that.

Thanks for playing in this weeks Theme Thursday, I enjoyed the view. Hope to see you next Thursday.

God bless.

Jeannette, said...

very metaphorically penned!thanks for sharing....

Harnett-Hargrove said...

The slip-stream often feels like this. Potent. Happy TT. -J