Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Thursday Prompts (Short Story Slam in Alphabe-Thursday)



 Alphabe-Thursday (X=The Unknown Variable )

Bluebell Books  Short Story Slam Week 11


Time crawls like mosquitoes in our ears,
Darkness hits without minding our fears:
The unknown variable,
Invisible and miserable,
makes life controversial:
A dead woman keeps dancing in her feet,
Witches plot a naked parade,
Under the force of a spade,
Bubbling thoughts start to fade,
As trees lift their arms to comb their hair,
Strangers are approaching you from nowhere.
“Hoot”, “hoot”,
is what owls are calling,
“Psst”, “Psst”,
is what rain is talking,
“Boo”, “Boo”,
Here comes the unknown,
 “Sss”, “Sss”,
A vampire starts to blow bloody kisses at you.


52 comments:

davidrheins said...

Very nicely done. Quite dark!

Ghosterb said...

Very nice! A great way to get people into a Halloween mood.

Anonymous said...

What a wonderful piece. "Loved" the first line! :-)

RHYTHM AND RHYME said...

Excellently written and most enjoyable to read.

Yvonne.

My name is Riet said...

Very interesting post.

Lisa H. said...

Sounds like you are ready for Halloween.

EG CameraGirl said...

Wow! Your words made me feel like I was right there!

Unknown said...

I think I would be ready to run from the kisses.

Judie said...

I LOVE this piece! The mosquito is used so expressively!!

Teresa said...

Very nice! I was surprised by the vampire at the end.

Anonymous said...

Whoa. Very cool. I love the dead women dancing in shoes, the combing hair, the vamps!

Teresa Marie said...

Good one! Just in time for Halloween too, lol.

nick said...

Preparing for Halloween, huh?

Debra Gray-Elliott said...

Wow! Love it! Thanks for stopping by.

Jyoti Mishra said...

intense n dark..
well composed :)

Anonymous said...

i wouldn't want a mosquito in my ear

21 Wits said...

Buzz...buzz...buzz....I love your poem it IS Xcellent!

Stacia said...

Love the image of trees combing their hair!

Wanda said...

Lots of good imagery here--I like the line about the trees reaching up to comb their hair.

People Who Know Me Would Say: said...

Delightfully creepy.....leading up, in careful measure, to that last line!

Anonymous said...

Bit scary, very well done :)

Berowne said...

Quite creative; impressive...

Kay said...

I like the part about the bloody kisses being blown. It's innovative. xoXox Boo!

Raw Thoughts And Feelings said...

Very nice, and love the twisted ending!

Serena Shay said...

Nice job, perfect for the time of year.

Lola said...

Great post and blog!

And thanks too for stopping by.

Have a great weekend & look forward to *seeing* you again next time,

XOXO LOLA:)

Rocky Mountain Woman said...

Well I'm certainly ready for Halloween now!

Susan Anderson said...

Definitely sets a macabre mood!

=)

Coralie Cederna Johnson said...

Creepy fun! Just in time for Halloween, too! Have a beautiful day and thanks so much for your visit!
Coralie

Caroline said...

Makes me think of Halloween. Creepy. LOl Great post! I'm going to read that to the kids on Halloween! :) Thanks for stopping by.

mish said...

Quite a depressing atmosphere ... deliciously dark ... :-)
http://writer-in-transit.co.za/bubble-bravado/

Ann LeFlore said...

I love your closing the vampire starts to blow bloody kisses at me this is excellent and so dark for Halloween
http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/09/29/bubbling-potion-of-love/

Marbles in My Pocket said...

Getting a jump on the Halloween rush, are we? Nice one!

http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/09/30/bubbles-and-lies/

jay said...

Ominous! Yet quite appealing. Me loves it! :)

bendedspoon said...

woot woot to your awesome talent! wonderful how all those thoughts came together :)

Anonymous said...

That first line grabbed me and made me cringe - what a super opening!! I loved the dead lady's feet and every other creepy thing about this. Great Halloween starter.

Kirtimalini said...

Very intriguing read..!
Thanks for visiting my blog. :)

Unknown said...

scary stuff well written ....thank you x

Anonymous said...

Delightfully macabre!

Anonymous said...

Its the unknown, the change in life which makes it interesting. Otherwise, everything would be so monotonous:)

Anonymous said...

Excellent, well done :)

Lolamouse said...

Eek-creepy!

Jenny said...

Oooh...Dark and Creepy.

And Xcellent job of making me shiver!

Thanks for a neat link! Really loved seeing your mad writing skills here.

A+

Anonymous said...

scary...indeed

Bargain Decorating with Laurie said...

What great imagery. Well done. laurie @ Battling My Inner Critic

Ann LeFlore said...

I have nominated you for the Versatile Bloggers Award. Your blog site is wonderful and I believe that you deserve this award. Please claim your award and follow the three requirements for this award. It is my honor to nominate you for this award. Thank you.

http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/04/versatile-blogger-award/

Chim's World of Literature said...

loved the interaction in this poem..

something to share with you :
http://mypoetrywriting.blogspot.com/2011/10/versatile-blogger-award.html

Ed Pilolla said...

creepy. i love it:)
several lines i adore: naked witches, bloody kisses.

Unknown said...

I love your word choices! Wonderful post!

e.a.s. demers said...

Oooo, nice one! I love the imagery :-)

Elizena said...

I loved this! The imagery was awesomely vivid. I could see all this happening as I walked along on a dark, but moonlit Autumn night. It was so much fun to read. Blessings!

http://elizena-lovingmycreator.blogspot.com/

br!nDle said...

Nice rhyming...and a great thought...a bit scary but having a deep inner meaning...liked it...:)