A stream craves to see a faraway river,
That sounds quite a favor;
It does not fit normal view,
because not all folks’ dreams can come true;
“Come fly with me”,
An invincible voice echoes repeatedly,
…
The stream is determined to go,
She would not listen to objections so,
To be able to fulfill the task,
She has lots of questions to ask;
Eventually she has preparations done,
Merrily, she marches ahead, what fun.
The path is full of twists and turns,
Yet the thirst to get closer still burns,
…
Crossing villages, hills, and cities,
Revolting from regions, states, and counties,
After numerous zigs and zags,
The stream is excited to see her new tags:
She has joined the river forever,
Her own identity does not matter.
Nobody knows what future might bring,
She is satisfied to live with her choice-her king
38 comments:
I feel that way sometimes. As if my own self is lost to the river. Felt. Nice write!
http://magicinthebackyard.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/letters-dear-death/
thank you for sharing x
Great Imagination.
lots of amazing imagery here
bumble bee
Wow, I love the thoughts of the stream going through all that to become part of the rier. Beautiful. I see lots of metaphor here.
Wonderful write!
http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/billy-bully-bull/
Effective use of the metaphor.. from stream to joining the river. As long as one knows the consequences, and can live with giving up their own identity...then its all that matters~
I agree! This is some great imagination works :)
In the end, I think the choice she made was the right one :)
Brought me into.
Nicely done.
To me it's like a free spirit going out on her/his own... great metaphor!
Great write
I'd say she didn't lose her identity so much as find it, by going against the "conventional" stream...
This hit me deep within me! I felt this... and you had many powerful lines....
Thanks for sharing such a beautiful poem!
~L
Interesting metaphor. One must be willing to drop identity to merge.
And river merge with sea!
Enchanting... a metaphorical masterpiece. My offering: http://verseinanutshell.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/count-on/
Beautifully written, one of your best
She grew and flew.
Good working of the metaphor.
I agree with LifeInVerse.
The poem has this feeling of emptiness and ultimately, being completed by the merging of the stream and the river in the end. Wonderful poem.
She has joined the river forever,
Her own identity does not matter.
Nobody knows what future might bring,
She is satisfied to live with her choice-her king
nice close...and she is the one that will have to live with that decision...this felt like a nice blend of the last 2 mags...
ohh I love the metaphors and beautiful imagery :D
Nicely done ... great imagery and metaphor use ... successful poem! :)
very nice, evocative poetry.
wow
I just want to thank you, and tell you your awesome.
great images
Yeah, you really got in the flow!
perfect as a fiction,
in reality, it is not going to work that magic though.
Thanks for sharing the beauty of creativity.
Becoming one with the river of life and rushing onward is a journey worth taking.
Whoa! I'm not quite sure how to take the end. I love the image of embarking on a seemingly impossible task, and making the perhaps lengthy and difficult preparations, and then finally going for it, and ending up content in a changed (perhaps even somewhat diminished or lost identity). Nice work.
And thank you for your visit and comments on my blog.
It's good to follow one's own convictions. I like this!
Very original both in idea and execution. K.
A great travel with lots of twists and turns... and a beautiful message.
Beautiful in every sense of the word! :)
mmmm... your words invited many emotions to my soul. This was absolutely beautiful!
~L
Very nice. It shows that we make our own paths in life and that we are interconnected and if one finds a river worth flowing into then how great is that.
Thanks for playing in this weeks Theme Thursday, I enjoyed the view. Hope to see you next Thursday.
God bless.
very metaphorically penned!thanks for sharing....
The slip-stream often feels like this. Potent. Happy TT. -J
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